Fun Palindromes

Palindromes are great fun.  They’re sentences that read exactly the same both forward or backward.  Try reading these both ways!

“A man, a plan, a canal: Panama.”
“Aid nine men, India.”
“Anne, I vote no one to Vienna.”
“A Toyota: race fast, safe car: a Toyota.”
“Boston did not sob.”
“But sad Eva saved a stub.”
“Cain: a maniac.”
“Campus motto: ‘Bottoms up, Mac.'”
“Can I attain a ‘C’?”
“Dennis sinned.”
“Dentist: ‘Sit, Ned.'”
“Desserts, I stressed!”
“Did Joe kill like O.J. did?”
“Do geese see God?”
“Emil, a sleepy baby, peels a lime.”
“Go deliver a dare, vile dog!”
“Go hang a salami! I’m a lasagna hog!”
“He won a Toyota now, eh?”
“I prefer pi.”
“I saw desserts; I’d no lemons, alas no melon. Distressed was I.”
“I was sad – no Hondas saw I.”
“Live not on evil, madam, live not on evil.”
“Murder for a jar of red rum.”
“Ned, I am a maiden.”
“Never odd or even.”
“No miss, it is Simon.”
“Now, sir, a war is won.”
“Put Eliot’s toilet up.”
“Race carrot or race car?”
“Senile felines.”
“Sit on a potato pan, Otis.”
“Slap my gym pals.”
“Star comedy by Democrats.”
“Tennis tips: saliva. Vilas spits in net.”
“Too bad, I hid a boot.”
“Wonton on salad? Alas, no, not now!”
“Yo! Banana boy!”

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Various Sports Quotes

“A tie game is like kissing your sister.”
[J. C. Humes]

“There are more pleasant things to do than beat up people.”
[Muhammad Ali]

“Football players, like prostitutes, are in the business of ruining their bodies for the pleasure of strangers.”
[Merele Kessler]

“I never bet on baseball.”
[Pete Rose]

“My toughest fight was with my first wife.”
[Muhammad Ali]

“I don’t think we can win every game. Just the next one.”
[Lou Holtz]

“Tennis is like marrying for money.  Love has nothing to do with it.”
[Phyllis Diller]

“Winning is not everything.  It’s the only thing.”
[Vince Lombardi]

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Bad Translations: Hilarious quotes

Some hilarious quotes as the result of some bad translations:

When General Motors introduced the Chevy Nova in South America, it was apparently unaware that “no va” means “it won’t go.” After the company figured out why it wasn’t selling any cars, it renamed the car in its Spanish markets to the Caribe.

Ford had a similar problem in Brazil when the Pinto flopped. The company found out that Pinto was Brazilian slang for “tiny male genitals.” Ford pried all the nameplates off and substituted Corcel, which means horse.

An American T-shirt maker in Miami printed shirts for the spanish market which promoted the Pope’s visit. Instead of the desired “I Saw the Pope” in Spanish, the shirts proclaimed “I Saw the Potato.”

Chicken-man Frank Perdue’s slogan, “It takes a tough man to make a tender chicken,” got terribly mangled in another Spanish translation. A photo of Perdue with one of his birds appeared on billboards all over Mexico with a caption that explained “It takes a hard man to make a chicken aroused.”

In Italy, an advertising campaign for Schweppes Tonic Water translated the name into Schweppes Toilet Water.  Zesty!

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